"Everybody's free to wear sunscreen"

- Baz Luhrman

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '99,

Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis or reliable then my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice....now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, nevermind, you won't understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded, but trust me in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future, or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind: the kind that blindsides you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts; don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive; forget the insults. (if you succeed in doing this, tell me how).

Keep your old love letters; throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives; some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of Calcium. Be kind to your knees -- you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40; maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary.

Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body: use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or what other people think of it; it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance...even if you have no where to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions (even if you don't follow them).

Do not read beauty magazines; they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents; you never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings: they're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but what a precious few should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps and geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.

Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old; and when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse, but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you are 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia; dispensing it is a way of wishing the past from the disposal--wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts, and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me, I'm the sunscreen.

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Some Thoughts

1. Sometimes, we remain so engrossed in trying to define something, we just accept any definition we can lay our hands on; often without a second thought that the source, after all, is human, and thus may be wrong! In some cases, we are left wondering how much that wrong judgement cost us, while in others we fail to realise that we were actually wrong!

2. Sometimes, everything seems to go wrong, all at once! Probably, the worst of it all is, when your entire support system seems to fail; when the people you fall back on, well, don't seem yours anymore; when you can't count on those closest to you. This is probably when people turn to their "Gods", or more appropriately, the divine.

3. Zodiacs don't work for me. I tried following my zodiac predictions from various sources for the past couple of months. Out of every 100 odd predictions, less than 10 hold would hold true. I found the lunar cycle a much better predictor for human behaviour.

4. During an actual natural calamity, even the best of trainings seem to fail. I realised this a few days back when, during an earthquake a few days back, 6 of us - all MBA students, ran out to a hanging balcony on the third floor. The best strategy would have been to hide under a table!

5. A little knowledge is more dangerous than its thought to be. In fact, it probably can even kill people. And no, little knowledge is not the same as bounded rationality. While bounded rationality is a genuine limitation of the human mind, little knowledge is just the immediate resort of the lazy!

6. Old perceptions, misconceptions and stereotypes die hard. In fact, they don't die at all. Even today, for quite a few people living in the big metros of India, things like inter caste marriage, divorce and second marriages are a taboo. For some, even love marriages are no different. Similarly, old loyalties hardly change. Those who claim to have switched loyalties mostly pretend!

7. Not everything in life is a balance sheet. You don't always need to balance both sides. In fact, it is this attempt of making the left and right sides equal that has caused much of the suffering in this world. But then again, for those who had spent a better part of their life matching the red and the blue, it is very difficult to change!

8. You can't just run slower because "Life is a marble race". It's true that if you drop the marble, you don't win even after coming first. But then again, in your attempt to save the marble, if someone finishes before you, you end up looking like the same old idiot. Then nobody listens to stuff like "I could've run faster, but I was saving my marble!". The world is cruel, and your relations are nothing "out of the world", the earlier you understand that, the better for you.

9. Dawn and dusk are probably the best parts of the day (unless you are really into starry, moonlight nights - which I am, by the way). Just love it when the darkness gives away to light, or when the light is eaten up by yet another patch of the dark. Makes me wish I was a poet. But I generally miss both these moments, either thanks to my sleep or to my class schedule. Now that I have the "Marble Race Theory", I can probably skip a class or two to watch the sunset!

10. People don't change, they never do! If you feel somebody around you has changed, then you failed to understand him/her in the first place, or they are just pretending!

Disclaimer: The following are entirely my perspective based on some of my own experiences. As a matter of fact, in most of the cases, I was caught on the wrong side of things! They may or may not be acceptable to every one. The author does not intend to hurt the sentiments of any of the readers.

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The Mumbai Diaries

Slot 0 summers, slot 0 summers – over!

The result – no PPO, i.e. by the unofficial standards – failed.

It’s a different question whether that no PPO was a product of my poor performance in the internship, or was it just the company that is in no mood to hire right now. It really doesn’t matter at the end of the day, because when some of my friends, some of my batch mates would be taking life by its horns with a PPO in their hand, I would have to sit in my room, studying, preparing for the finals, building CV points!

As I approach the end of my internship, life starts to look like a journey without a destination. The first few months of my IIM life was all about securing a good summer internship. The next few months went by looking forward to the coveted slot 0 internship that I bagged. During my internship, my first few weeks were spent looking forward to, apart from the internship itself, my return to Joka, to its carefree life. Now the internship is about to last just two weeks more. The return date to Joka has started looking more real. The internship chapter of my life is about to draw its conclusion.

I always knew this company does not give a PPO. I knew that right from the time I got selected. But that never struck me as a reality. Now, it seems to be looking into my eyes. The depressed market, the traditional absence of high paying finance companies from the final placements, my not-so-great CGPA (unlikely to become the so-great CGPA by the time of placements) make this feeling even worse. Would I land up with a good job? Would it pay me well? Would it me in a company and area of my interest? I don’t know, and I am really not optimistic about it.

It’s not just the job, it’s my entire life. What is your aim in life? I don’t know, I have never thought about it. In the rush of competitive exams and never ending milestones, I have never planned my life beyond a year. Now that I hardly have any more competitive exams to take, and with only a few milestones ahead, this thought has started bothering me again. What should I do with my life? Should I just take a job, and then hop to a better one, then to an even better one and so on? What is my dream job? What is my priority sector? (Not because it is “hot” and “glamorous”, but because I like it). What is my long term goal in life? Is it job? Or is it something else like academia or entrepreneurship?

I don’t know what has happened to me. I don’t know why I am thinking about all these things all of a sudden. May be because of the realisation that I have already avoided these questions as much as I could, may be because now these questions demand an answer. I wish I could at least have a clue how to solve these riddles. But I have none. For the first time in my life, I find myself helpless. For the first time in my life, I have got nothing. I am broke!

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At the other side of the year...

What date was it? 16th of June? or was it 17th? No, it was 16th, I am sure. The day I arrived at Joka. Yet another campus, yet another degree, yet another platform for battle. I remember, on that day my mind kept on drifting back to the past, my days in school, my days in college, my first day away from home, amidst total strangers. This is what I wrote in my journal that night:-

Today, on my first evening at the IIM campus, or at "Joka" as it is popularly known, memories flash by infront of my eyes. Memories of struggles. The sight of a kid sitting in a rented room in the rural Purulia. The image of that kid sweating in the scorching summer in power cut, but still studying. The memories of the kid getting nightmares of failures and jeers. And now that kid is sitting on another table and writing this.

So far, all I have learnt is, life is fair, irrespective of what people might say. People get exactly what they deserve - no more, no less. Those who work hard and still fail to succeed do so probably because they dont think well, or strategise hard.

Now, at the end of my first year in IIMC, I am more of a manager. I have seen a lot of difficult times in these months, times that have tested me, stretched me beyond my limits, leaving me to discover that they were not my limits after all. I have made new friends, I have learnt new ways to live life. Never in this last one year did I want all this to end, not once. Not even on days when I got no sleep for over 60 hours, not even on days when half the batch criticised my decisions as a student representative. I could find a learning in each and every situation this place put me through, and this explains how much of a value add this place has been to me.

Tonight is practically the last night for our batch as freshers. Yes, there are official deadlines, but then, not all things can be defined in an academic calendar!

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Friday Night ...

As I lay on the roof on a chilly winter night, gazing at the lone star in the foggy sky, I thought about the last week and what it had taught me! The last week has been particularly interesting in my 6 month long stay in Joka. I had learnt some valuable lessons on both the positive and negative sides of human beings.

As of now, I hold two portfolios in my college - a member of the students council, and the head of ISG (the cyber group). ISG, from the very first day, has been an wonderful experience for me. ISG has given me something that I had always wanted - a chance to use my programming skills for the benefit of others. Now that I am the head, I have the opportunity to lead a group of very motivated people. Everyone in the college agrees that ISG is the most active group on campus! 

I saw the negative side as a member of the Students council.  I saw how dirty fights can get between people, I saw how people can bury their ethics in the graveyard of practicality. I saw how matters apparently personal become so big for people! At one point in time, I really wanted to quit. I would rather sit in my room, jobless, than handling all these!

But thats the fun with college. It exposes you to all kinds of challenges. It makes you ready for the world. It shows you a prototype of your life, something that you would lead for the next 40 or 50 or 60 years! So, as I lay up on the roof, watching the lone star, I thanked it for giving me this opportunity, this learning, this exposure. Friday night, huh !! 

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डरपोक हो तुम

सच का सामना करने से बचते हो तुम
जो भी हो डरपोक हो तुम

बस निर्दोष पे वार करते हो तुम
जो भी हो डरपोक हो तुम

सामने आते नेही, छुप छुप के निशाना लगाते हो
कहते हो शेर का, पर चूहे का दिल रखते हो तुम
जो भी हो डरपोक हो तुम

ग़लत करके भी ख़ुद पे गर्व करते हो तुम
जो भी हो डरपोक हो तुम

इंसानियत को शर्मिन्दा करते हो तुम
जो भी हो डरपोक हो तुम

अपनो से पूछो वे क्या सोचते हैं तुम्हारे बारे में
यही सोचते हैं, की बहुत डरपोक हो तुम

- Courtesy: Radio Mirchi

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I let it go - again !!

I don't know whether I should praise myself for cracking a day 0 offer (the most coveted thing in my college), or whether I should criticize myself for once again going with the herd and neglecting what I really wanted. 

What did I want? Well, for over the last five years, I have wanted to be associated with the software industry, be it in the form of an engineer or a manager. And I have always found an excuse for denying myself that demand of mine. Be it because of a bearish IT industry or be it because of yet better options - each time I came close to fulfilling my dream, I have only moved farther away.

Lots of people in my college would probably kill for the offer that I have got, and that is my sole consolation, sole defence. But in doing so, I have missed probably my last chance to follow my dream. As of now, I am "successful" in worldly terms, but still my heart denies that accolade !!

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